Britney Annice

"Man, I can't wait to get a car" Hey, be careful what you wish for. Don`t get me wrong, my car is a HUGE blessing. I`m so glad that I`m not walking in the cold or having no other choice but to catch the bus or the train. I mean, of course, public transportation is not as big in St. Louis as it is in Chicago, so I kind of had no choice no matter what. But why y'all ain't tell me how expensive these little four wheel monsters were. I thought all I had to do was look sexy in it, wash it, and have a couple extra dollars to feed it some gas. I was wrong. My parents and grandparents used to always use this one particular phrase that stuck with me my whole life, "Keep on livin". Whenever I felt like I`d had enough with life or if I fixed my mouth to say what I would never do, they`d hit me with that. Ya`ll, I thought I had enough at 15. Well, I`m here to tell you, 26 is a trip. I think this is the year of enlightenment for me. Or either it`s the year that I ...

"Aw you have a crush on him? I`m gone hook y'all up" Look, I`m a grown woman, I don't need anybody to hook me up. If I like someone, I`ll tell them myself. We are not in high school anymore, I got this. I know how to speak up for myself. Just kidding, I`m just going to stalk them on social media, hide in the bushes when they pass by, write their name in cursive 100 times, and cry myself to sleep at night. So here`s the thing, it`s very, very rare that I will have an actual crush on someone. I often find people attractive or interesting, but a crush? That`s totally different in my opinion. To admire someone from a far. Everything about them. Not just their appearance but their character and the way they handle things and seem to go about life (Let me know if this starts to get too weird for you). It takes a lot more than a beautiful smile and some well groomed facial hair to get my attention. I mean, that`s a good start, but its not the whole package. Like, dang, can...

"Why don't y'all come on over for Thanksgiving?" The answer is probably no or we will see. Guys, brace yourselves, the holiday season is upon us again. I know, I know, you probably think it`s a little early to be talking about Thanksgiving. We haven't even gotten past Halloween yet, but this is the time I look forward to the most. I get to be around family, friends and most importantly, I get to eat! It`s the one day of the year when you don't have to feel bad for digging in. Yes, I know the history behind this day, but to me, it means spending time with loved ones and reflecting on all of the things I have to be thankful for. Besides, I`m not super creative when it comes to Halloween costumes. I`d probably just wear my panties and bra and call myself a Victoria Secret angel like I see the other girls do. Or maybe a sexy waitress, a sexy nurse, or a sexy infant. Y'all will make anything sexy huh? There wasn't anything sexy about me when I was an infant...

"No, it's cool, I`ll drive" Listen, depending on who I`m with, I like to be in control. I`m not one of those people with a large circle of friends. I am very picky about the people that I choose to kick it with. I've been in too many situations where I was stuck somewhere with a group of people, but I was the only one who was ready to go home. Story of my life. I`m always ready to go home. The food is free and the sheets is warm! As I've mentioned before, when living in Chicago, I had no car. Now that I look back, that was a blessing and burden at the same time. I walked EVERYWHERE. I took the trains, buses and cabs anywhere I wanted to go. Y'all know my calf muscles was on point, right? I hated waiting in the cold for the train or walking in bad weather, but man, I had my little grocery cart that I put together myself with the wheels on it. I`d roll that joker down the street with them groceries so good, I made being car-less look cool. I didn't have to...

"Oh my goodness, your hair is so cute, did you cut it?" or "You have some really fun hair!" Oh how interesting it is to be a black woman wearing her natural hair. Look how far we have come. But, look how far we still have left to go. Let me tell y'all something, it is hard enough to find love for yourself, as a woman in a world where they think its only one type of beauty, but, to be not only a woman, but a black woman? Tuh! You got to dig deep because they aren't serving those compliments up on a silver platter to us. Well, somebody was serving something up on a platter to us because where did we get these hips, lips, and thighs from girl? Fellas, don't leave, I think y'all can enjoy this post too. Don't you want to get in touch with your feminine side? Don't cry though. Man tears make me awkward. Now if you were a little black kid in the 90`s or you were just a kid that paid attention to commercials, you remember the hair product called ...

"So how old are you? Do you have kids? What`s your Facebook?" At this day in age, it is almost second nature to ask for a person`s social media when you first meet them. If they don`t have it, be honest, you're giving them the side eye. Dude, my mom has Facebook and you're like 30 years younger than her. What you hiding homie? Look, I've been through enough in my life to know that if you cant google them you cant trust them. Come on, I know you got a Linked In account or something. A old myspace? Something! Its some traces of you on the Internet somewhere and I`m going to find them (EVIL LAUGH). Now don't get me wrong, I grew up during the time when computers and technology were just starting to rear its ugly head. I remember when my mom first help me set up my own email account (which I still use til this day). Then, I found out that I could instant message my friends through the computer. I was blown away! And you better believe my parents were standing ri...

"Maybe I should go to bar tending school. I think I`d be good at that." So, I guess I`m at this really weird stage in my life where I feel like I should have a back up plan, for my back up plan. Ya know, just in case something doesn't work out. Well, I haven't quite had anything that has "worked out" yet, but see, I kind of have this dream of paying my bills by entertaining people for a living. Or I could just give it all up, marry a ball player, be a real housewife of St. Louis and fight other women on T.V, we`ll see what happens. After college, I got my first full time job as a teacher. I thought that was the smartest move to make because I figured, I`d teach in the day and audition in the evening. Wrong, for so many different reasons. My days as a teacher were long, there was no time for auditions and I honestly didn't really care for it anyway. I totally switched back up plans and went a whole different route with job choices. Most of my jobs have ...

"You never know who's watching you" I was always told this as a child. Most of the time, I think it was to creep me out and scare me into believing that my parents would find out what I did even if I thought no one saw me. Mission accomplished. But, as I got older, that saying meant so much more. Like now, I feel like it means, your ex is probably creeping on your social media, so don't post any ugly pictures. Just kidding, there's a real point to this blog post. They say (whoever "they" is) that you may go through a quarter life crisis at 25. Well, I thought it skipped me because I was actually having the time of my life at 25. Things were moving along great! At least I thought so. But then I turned 26. *DUN DUN* (that's the Law and Order sound.) I swear to you, within that first week of me being 26, everything around me started going crazy. Well, to start it off, I came home to my LA apartment after traveling for work, only to get comfortable, go i...