Skip to main content

A BACK UP PLAN, FOR MY BACK UP PLAN

"Maybe I should go to bar tending school. I think I`d be good at that." So, I guess I`m at this really weird stage in my life where I feel like I should have a back up plan, for my back up plan. Ya know, just in case something doesn't work out. Well, I haven't quite had anything that has "worked out" yet, but see, I kind of have this dream of paying my bills by entertaining people for a living. Or I could just give it all up, marry a ball player, be a real housewife of St. Louis and fight other women on T.V, we`ll see what happens.

After college, I got my first full time job as a teacher. I thought that was the smartest move to make because I figured, I`d teach in the day and audition in the evening. Wrong, for so many different reasons. My days as a teacher were long, there was no time for auditions and I honestly didn't really care for it anyway. I totally switched back up plans and went a whole different route with job choices. Most of my jobs have had nothing to do with my degree. Guys, that what happens when you go to art school. Unless you're lucky. If you have a good job job in your field, I hate you.

Lately, I've been having some of the most ridiculous thoughts running through my head. Like "Maybe I should go to a barber school", I mean, how hard can it be to learn to cut men`s hair? Men aren't as picky as women right? I might meet the love of my life with that job. It`s better than getting a Tinder account. That`s multitasking. Make ya money, get the honey (Did y'all like what I just did there?). Now y'all know I can`t be a barber. What am I going to do if somebody sexy sits in my chair? Y`all know my hands get shaky when I`m nervous. What if I accidentally cut him with the razor and he start shooting? I don't know, in my head, all bad scenarios end with somebody shooting. Or, what if he doesn't tip me? Now I got to rob him while he walking to his car at night. I don't play about my money.

Look, I don't know where I might end up. I might be making your drinks in the club, snatching weaves out on t.v, making lesson plans for your kids or getting shot at by some pissed off, sexy dude with an uneven lining. Who knows? In the mean time, just keep coming back to Aintbritfunny and listen to me complain.

Let me know if you need you need your grass cut or something. I charge about $150. I need to borrow your lawn mower though.

-BRIT

 

Comments

  1. Ronald BoboOctober 8, 2015 at 12:35 PM

    Brit, you are VERY funny! I didn't know this and I've known you all of your life! I think we need to talk. I would love to use your gifts in a variety of places!
    Ronald Bobo, Sr.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Britney AnniceOctober 8, 2015 at 7:17 PM

      Thank you so much for visiting! Yes, would love to talk to you more about it!

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

SWIPE RIGHT FOR THE ONE TIME

" I need a date for Valentine's Day " or " Another Valentine's Day...Alone ." or " 2 more weeks til Valentine's Day, who's gonna be my date ?" First of all, why have we been stressing about this day since the end of December? Secondly, I need a "pre-date" before I go out with you on Valentine's Day. What if you end up being crazy? What if you're boring and I don't like you? Then when we go out, I end up seeing the guy that I really like. Now I gotta peace you out. You ain't about to mess up a potential marriage for me. Hell. As crazy as this may sound to you, I never really saw Valentine's Day as a day to be miserable and in my feelings about the man who's not here rubbing my feet. I do that on Tuesdays. I remember being a little girl seeing my daddy walk through the door with balloons, flowers, cards, teddy bears, candies and cakes for me and my mother every Valentine's Day. We could always expect ...
Post a Comment
Read more

JUNE 24TH FOR THE 26TH TIME

"This year I turn 26, damn it seem it came so quick. My ass and legs have gotten thick." Those are words from the great Erykah Badu. I tweaked the age a little bit. Man, I can really relate to that line. If you didn`t know, I celebrated my 26th birthday on June 24, 2015. Every birthday that I`ve ever had, I`ve looked forward to. I planned parties, organized trips, time off from work, etc. But this birthday was different. It didn`t feel the same this year. Usually, I`m anticipating the 24th. "What am I gonna wear?", "I need to loose some weight!", "I need home girl to take my shift!" Nope. Not this year. I was in the airport traveling for work because I. NEED. MONEY. I spent the months before planning new insurance and thinking about how I`m only 4 years away from 30. I can`t even click the 18-25 age group on job applications now. I`m starting to think about stability and stuff. All the bagels and sandwich breads are going to my hips. I`m attrac...
1 comment
Read more

DRANKS AND PAINTS AND VIBES

"I wanna go out, but I don't want to be around a whole lot of people, but I wanna mingle and see new faces and I wanna hear good music but I don't wanna dance." If you're anything like me, an extroverted introvert, you appreciate a good night out minus all of the extra stuff like heels and crowds you can't move in. I wanted to bring in this past birthday as cool and chill as possible. You know, flats, cupcakes, a drink and a nap. Well, I started my weekend just the way I wanted to with the Specialty Cocktails + Urban Art Workshop! Yes, we was in there drinking and spray painting. What more can I ask for? Now, my first run in with spray paint was not a good one. Let me give ya'll a very quick story: Aight so boom... the year was 2009. I was out with some friends from school roaming the streets of Chicago at night. Keep in mind, I went to an art school so all of my friends were some sort of artists. The guys we were hanging with were sic...
Post a Comment
Read more